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June 2005
The TAT Forum
Selected works of Richard Rose
&
Other key spiritual voices
Essays, poems, opinions and humor on seeking
and finding answers to your deepest life-questions
Jacob's Ladder (conclusion), by Richard Rose
beginning in the February 2005 TAT Forum
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Q. How do you go about developing your intuition?
R. Yes. I think there are ways that you can perfect your intuition. This is one
of the big things. Of course, there are ways of testing it. I think even ESP
experimentation and that sort of thing tests your intuition. Because intuition
is something more of a direct mind experience.
They say the yogis, centuries ago, used to study astronomy by not using charts
or stuff, but they would look at a planet, say, until they became one with it.
If you want to be a real psychologist, there's a simple formula: you step inside
the man's shoes and walk in his thoughts. And you know. You don't have many
words to describe what goes on. But this is possible; you can step inside.
Lots of times you know this. All of you here have met somebody, that you bumped
up to, and all at once you stopped and you looked -- you never saw that man
before in your life, but you knew him, and beyond a shadow of a doubt knew what
to expect out of him.
This is intuition. Ok. So -- if that guy comes along later and borrows five
hundred dollars from you, and doesn't come back -- you know you were wrong. So
that's the test.
Q. Would it be safe to make the assumption that there's a circle or blob in
every one of us that's all of the same stuff?
R. I do.
(Break in tape.)
(Rose) ...making capital and small "s". Of course, most of us begin by thinking
that the self is the capital-S self. But after we see it from an anterior
viewpoint, we discover that we were misjudging, and it was a small-s self. Or a
mundane self, or an ego, or one of these I's.
So then immediately we are displaced from that small-s self to a degree, toward
a capital-S Self. And when you reach the maximum, capital-S self, you are one
with.
Q. Is there sort of an unformed blob there that is acted upon, or does it act,
or is it beyond action?
R. I know what you're getting at, and I don't ... maybe if I knew I wouldn't
even tell you. Because I think it's impossible that everybody act as though they
can't act. And if you thought that it would happen whether you acted or not,
nobody would act. I'm a believer that you have to believe that you can act.
Q. As this other gentleman was saying, from a certain perspective most of the
things we do are, after reaching that point, really kind of absurd....
R. Oh, yeah. That's the process of life.
Q. For instance, if you're dying, or if you come very close to death, from the
perspective of your dying, everything else is sort of trivial.
R. That's right. Some hate to come back. As I said, there's a lot of stuff
written now that wasn't written before. Like Raymond Moody's books. Kubler-Ross
also writes on the death experiences. In very few of these cases is there
scratching the wallpaper off the wall. Very seldom. They generally say, "Oh,
well -- Ok."
I remember one case back home. An old man, a doctor, about eighty years of age
was dying. And naturally everybody in the hospital knew him. And they tried to
revive him, they threw him down on the floor and pounded his chest. And he came
back -- and proceeded to curse them all out.
Q. What can you say about death in relation to the ego?
R. Well, this is really what death is. Most of our comprehension of death is the
death of the ego. So if all of the egos collapse, then we go through what we
really believe is a physical death.
This is what happens at death. You have the ego, say, of importance. That you're
important enough to live forever or something. Or maybe you hope; hope is a kind
of an ego too.
But when a person is told by the doctor, "You have two or three hours to live,"
he realizes that in a short while, what he conceived of as being him -- unless
he's had an experience of something of a philosophic type -- his concept, if
it's somatic, will be that his totality is going to be decayed, just within a
very short period of time. He may die within an hour and be nothing but a
decayed body.
So in the process -- he gives up. He knows better. And I maintain that quite a
few people, possibly, go through before they die a realization that results from
dropping all of those egos. And then they know -- they know the answer. Now if
they die, of course, they can't tell you. But some come back.
St. Paul, by El Greco
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Now this is this process. The process of dropping egos is death. We die a
little, as Saint Paul said I think -- he died a little every day. Because he was
getting rid of his egos every day.
Q. You have to encounter risk to the ego, and disruptions and displacements?
R. Yes. There's a little thing that you have to watch. You can drop your vanity
-- or it will be just like me, the hair falls out and you're not quite as vain.
So that's no problem; some of the vanity leaves.
Then you have an intellectual vanity, an intellectual ego. That can leave.
But you have to hang onto the vanity of the importance of yourself as a living
creature. Most people think, "Oh, those other people out there, those poor
devils, aren't as important as I am. I'm really important." Almost everybody has
that. And he has to maintain that, that I call pride, because if he doesn't he's
liable to let his body organism deteriorate.
You have to have that basic pride. You can't dump all your egos.
So when a guy goes through this experience of Sahaja Samadhi it's a synthetic
thing, in which he really goes through it, loses his body pride, loses his
importance in relation to the cosmos: "In the next few minutes I may be zero,
obliviated for ever." And when he does that he drops all of his ego and boom,
the light goes on.
Now -- I'm telling you something I can't prove. I'm just telling you an
experience.
So then when he comes back, if he wants to live, he better get his ego back and
start scrubbing his teeth. And watching the diseases he catches, and be proud of
his appearance and his stamina and everything -- or he's going to rot while he's
on his feet.
Q. From my limited experience and from reading Moody's books and other accounts,
it seems that you do bring back something -- you may see the hills and the
valleys as they were, but you relate to them in a different way.
R. Right, right.
Q. So there is some goal, something you want to do, some kind of a contribution,
some way of operating from a higher place....
R. Well -- for instance, I don't know how much of a contribution I make. I often
wonder. Sometimes I think it's all ego. But I do feel this, that I don't look at
things the same. I don't see things in the same importance. The death of my
relatives, for instance. I don't say now, "Oh, this is terrible." Because the
previous conception was they were gone forever. Now I say they might be a hell
of a sight better off. It's over. See what I mean? And there's no extinction.
Another thing is the idea of competition. I can't get competitive. I can't see
the sense in what's important, whether you have three apples and I've only got
two. This to me becomes ridiculous.
The same thing in relation to the appetites. Some of these boys have known me
for several years, and they joke about the way I eat; I'm not conscious of what
I eat. I could care less what I eat. I just hope they've taken the feathers off
it before it gets to me, that's all. And the same way with sex; I can't get
identified, I can't get steamed up over something else which I know is a body,
that's all, with a hell of a lot of problems.
So sure, I'm not saying I didn't. I got married and raised a family after this
happened. But -- it wasn't anything romantic for my wife, I'm afraid.
Q. When you're watching all of these relative egos, and slowly getting rid of
the ones that you see are not very real, or misleading and so on -- do you ever
get to something that might be called a genuine relative self?
R. Yeah, you've got it right now. Everybody's got a genuine relative self.
Q. What I mean -- that you get rid of falseness, but there's something like a
real ego, before you get rid of the real one. Or even does that last one fall
too, then?
R. Well, no, I don't see -- they're only real in relation to their function.
They're all real.
Q. Well, like the Christian notion that there's an individual soul, that you've
been molded....
R. The thing is -- I'm convinced that I am an individual soul, and I'm convinced
that I am not in any ways individual, from the total absolute essence. Now
that's what you find out. I am nothing. And yet I am everything.
Q. There's nothing like individuality, where one soul is different?
R. Oh yes, it's like a drop of water, in the ocean, trying to break loose and
vote. He might be there, and he's conscious, but he's one -- the ocean is one
big drop. This is the paradox. You have to be prepared in philosophy for the
paradox. And not that we want to, or want to throw one in there every time, no.
But this is what you discover.
When you get there, too, possibly, you might have more separateness than what
you feel. You'll be separate. But you'll be one, because you're still observing.
The drop of water is still observing the surrounding ocean. But it's boundaries
might not be the same.
Q. I know you don't want to push any system of religion, and you just want to be
effective -- so do you have any advice, or any catalysts?
R. Well, I wouldn't say that I don't do anything, because I did write a book,
and that's provocative. I like to shake people's heads up and say, "Hey, start
thinking." (I don't say that everything in there is really kosher, that you need
to have it.)
By the same token I've dedicated the rest of my life to whatever I could do to
help people. I have a tract of ground back home, and I turned it over to some
people to use as an ashram, so that they'd have a place to come and think.
Because it's very difficult to think, and it's good if you live in town to at
least once a year shake your head loose from the squirrel cage. You can't stop
your thoughts and start new ones. You have to get completely away from the job.
So I felt that this was necessary.
I felt it was necessary when I was younger -- and I didn't have it. So when I
got some land I turned a section of it over for that use. So that people could.
And I think that it's important.
I think there's a number of steps, sure. I don't say that there isn't advice.
For instance, I believe the first thing that you have to do is to establish a
priority on what you want in life. Regardless -- if it's a million dollars, go
out whole hog for it. And if it's a spiritual thing -- I use the word spiritual,
but you can redefine that to suit yourself, you can be philosophical if you wish
to call it that.
But don't do it halfway. Because you're only going to get halfway. And halfway
to eternity is nowhere. You can go halfway to a million and get five hundred
thousand, but halfway to eternity is nowhere. That's still ignorance. Because
you know nothing until you know everything.
That's what I meant about definition. I said, "Define yourself," and immediately
the man's right; he says, "You can't." That's right; but you keep belaboring
with it. But then once you find anything you know everything. Once you really
define it then you know everything.
But to do that requires a relative setting. Possibly to have somebody irritate
you a bit now and then. And if a lecture or a book or a little ashram someplace
where people peck at you and ask you questions -- if that helps, Ok, that's
good.
But I don't interfere; I don't try to say, "You are now a thirty-second degree
so-and-so." No. I don't gauge. Because -- I'll tell you something else: I don't
believe I'm doing anything. I believe it would be facetious if I were to try to
take over somebody's life.
Any experience -- my experience was spontaneous. If you could predict, if you
could take a system by which you would reach enlightenment step by step, and
write it down in a book, it would not be enlightenment. Because of the risk that
you would have to take into account that this would be created by the mind,
under conditions. Predicted conditions.
To be scientific in esoteric matters you have to divert diametrically opposite
to scientific prediction and result. Prediction and result are the basis of
science. And a spiritual experience has to be unpredicted. Spontaneous.
Because if you go about it in such a way that you say, "Now I'm getting two
degrees hotter, three degrees closer, now such and such will occur, and then
tomorrow I'll have so many degrees of enlightenment..." Nonsense. You'll be
kidding yourself. It has to pop on you like a lightening bolt.
Ok -- anybody that tries to take a systematic approach to a lightening bolt --
is going to be lying to you, I think. Or maybe killing your time for you.
But I do believe you can do certain mundane things. Collective economy -- you
can go in there and cook on the same stove and chop firewood together, and
protect yourselves by your numbers, so that people will let you think a little
while. You get a thirty day vacation -- Ok, go think. That gives you at least a
new perspective. You're not going to be thinking the same treadmill thoughts 365
days out of the year.
And that's the reason there's a group here in Los Angeles. That some fellows
here decided that they would meet, once a week or so, just to say, "Hey, what
are you thinking? Are you still on the treadmill? Get off the treadmill."
Q. What is your way of reaching the mind of a spiritual seeker who comes to you?
R. Mostly attack. I ask people what they believe. And you'd be surprised. A lot
of them I don't say anything to, because -- if they're creating themselves a
heaven out of faith and belief and fear, you leave them alone. You can only help
people who have ears.
Only people can hear who have ears. Meaning, I might talk to you and you might
hear me. You may talk to somebody else and they may hear you. But I talk to that
person and they won't hear me. It's a strange situation there. You waste your
time if you reach what I call too far down on the ladder.
I look upon this student-teacher business as a ladder. We are restricted to the
understanding of three rungs on the ladder. We can see the man who teaches us,
and vaguely maybe understand him. The man on the rung below -- we can see him,
he can see us, and we can help him. And this is the law; we have to help him.
We're supposed to.
We're supposed to learn something from somebody else. You can't learn too much
from people on your own rung. You have to work with those on your own rung;
that's the relationship there. The brotherhood -- on your own rung.
Now if you look up too far, if you reach up too far, you won't understand that
man. This is where the language comes in and the ears. You'll write him off as
being crazy. You'll reject his theories or whatever. And that's a safety valve;
you're not ready, you don't have the capacity.
If you reach down two rungs or more to help somebody -- crucifixion is the
result. That's what happened to Christ. He reached down too many rungs. They
pulled him down by the hair of the head. You only can talk to those who have an
understanding.
End of talk.
© 1976 by Richard Rose. All Rights Reserved. This talk is available on
CD through Rose Publications.
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Poems by Shawn Nevins
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How can I exist?
coming into being like a flame.
This morning,
I am all flame edge --
that place between fire and air.
My very life is death,
and death a door pouring forth life.
Neither sensible nor meaningful.
*
In the highest expression
words come from nowhere --
that place
that removes "me."
Between,
a wall that must be
battered down
by desire, desperation, and resignation
to search.
*
We are November butterflies
flitting under a cool sun
among dried-up flowers.
Frantic motion covering the same ground
again and again.
Don't let your life be
a series of again and agains.
This is a good day to land.
*
A crow and a human voice
sound no different
down here by water's edge.
Both lay claim
to what is not theirs.
There is an ever present edge
in everything we do --
a frightening peace
lapping between our words.
*
I can't dream of summer
when it is fall.
Or worship this day
when it died long ago.
Will you be honest
and speak of what is,
or better yet, what is not?
*
Even I imbue images with life.
I who cannot speak of his self
without dreaming.
This is an empty room
with no walls.
If you were Here,
I'd say nothing at all.
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Things Are Not What They Seem
by Bart Marshall
Dreams have long been used as a metaphor for the transient, ephemeral, un-real
nature of waking life. Plato used the analogy of shadows cast on a cave wall by
firelight. Contemporary philosophers have compared waking life to a movie
projected on a screen. Now we can create metaphors from holograms and virtual
reality. But they all convey the same message: "Things are not what they seem."
These metaphors also ask: "Who is it that watches this dream/shadow/movie/game?"
Where is the observer behind it all that ISN'T a shadow character in the dream?
Right now, for instance, is it the observer who reads these words? Is it the one
who stands apart in judgment of the reader? Is it some ultimate observer you
believe in but have yet to touch? Or is it perhaps that as deep into the
observer lineup as we go in this hall of mirrors the observers are all false?
In the end, it seems, there is no real observer behind it all. There is no place
of final refuge. It is always the same false observer, slipping into a new guise
as an anterior, superior, observer. Observers, no matter how sublime, must by
their very nature stand apart from what is observed or they cease to be. In
Reality, nothing stands apart. There is only Unity, the One.
It is the dream of an ultimate observer -- a place of final refuge -- that
blocks the light. When observing stops, the Real appears -- crystal clear and
empty.
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The Language of the Soul
by Richard Rose
I think it might be a good idea to look for our understanding of the mind in the
mind itself.
... In direct-mind introspection, the mind stares at itself, and eliminates the
mind-functions that would prematurely destroy the body, or would distort the
ability to recognize the true states of mind. Only the true states
of mind will lead us to the True Scientific Realization.
Moods are like colored glass through which we view the world, and because of
which we build states of mind.
A state of mind carries conviction and may result from a long period of
accumulation of various convictions, and those convictions may have been
inspired by totally non-logical moods.
... Moods can lift us to pleasant heights or drag us down to mental states that
lead to murder or suicide. Yet at the same time I maintain that even the darker
moods which lead to despair and death will turn into good for us if we view them
from a detached or superior position, or we might say from the
umbrella-viewpoint. Pleasant moods indicate correct direction, that is,
direction toward ultimate realization or peace of mind. Unpleasant moods are
signal to review our aims. Even unpleasant moods may be the result of
tremendously pleasant experiences, wherein depression results from an intuitive
recognition that the sensuosity is a sliding board that sweeps us irrevocably
into a mental trap in which the sensuosity is blunted or jaded, and in which the
vision of simple serenity is never attainable.
In order to evaluate moods from a superior position, we have to study them after
they have passed. Moods do not let us go just because they made us unhappy or
suicidal. Yet after the mood has passed, and has been studied, the analysis has
to involve some picture of its origin, and some determination of the means to
avoid its recurrence in the future.
Moods ... cause or re-trigger states of mind. The state of mind then facilitates
an easy return of the mood.
I found that the study of dreams led me to a better understanding of moods....
The subject-matter of a dream is not as important as the "feel" of a dream. You
may feel as though a message is being conveyed to you through feeling which has
nothing to do with the grotesque or fantasy-like events in the dream.
... I have found that there are three major moods in dreamland. Dreamland is a
separate place, a stage or a state. One of the moods is fear. Another is
seduction or acquisition. And the third is nostalgia.... The above three moods
represent three great motivations that for some reason have been ingrained or
programmed into all people. I think that the understanding of the effects of
moods, and combinations of moods, will bring us closer to an understanding of
the non-somatic mind and how it affects -- seriously -- the life of the body.
I maintain that the nostalgic mood becomes the language of the soul. It
is the inner man trying to get through the earth-man's paradigm, to communicate
with him.
© 1985 by Richard Rose. All Rights Reserved. Excerpts from "The Lecture on
Moods" in The Direct-Mind Experience. Both the book and a CD of the Moods
Lecture are available from Rose
Publications.
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Everything Will Be Okay
by Art Ticknor
Knowing the self is a complex and confusing endeavor involving the hilarious
dog-chases-tail pursuit -- probably not funny to the dog -- of using the mind to
study the mind. The difference between man and dog, I presume, is that dogs
don't acquire the ability to laugh at themselves.
Where does dream-study come into this quest for knowing the self? What I found
were the following values:
Solace when feeling alone, comfort when feeling misery.
Before launching into a conscious effort of looking within for answers, I
thought I hardly ever dreamed. Then I started experimenting with fasting during
solitary retreats, and I became aware of many dreams every night. Some of the
dreams were humorous, such as riding a bicycle with a loaf of freshly-baked
bread in the basket, starting to take a bite of the loaf, remembering I was
fasting and shouldn't do so -- and waking with a laugh at my dream-antics. A
pattern also developed where a childhood friend, whom I hadn't seen since high
school, began visiting me in dreams. Though infrequent, these visits spanned
many years, each time leaving me feeling greatly comforted.
Material for studying experience with objectivity.
In order to consider our behavior somewhat dispassionately, there has to be some
distance from it. This detachment is rather easy when it comes to dream
material, and I believe there was a carryover value for me when considering
waking-state behavior. We may start with reviewing rough spots that are far
enough in the past so that we don't get caught up in the emotional content
again. Progressively we learn to do this with more recent external events and
also with internal observations of thoughts and feelings. The great value in all
this observation is that by not turning away from the times when our sense of
self is shaken, we're able to release our grasp of faulty beliefs about what we
are.
When life seems to be in a hopeless bind, an endless loop of conflicting and
therefore unsatisfiable desires, an avenue for continuing to probe and question.
We don't know how long the search for our true identity may take. And we don't
know how long periods of feeling stuck in no-progress may last. During these
periods, observation of the seemingly endless repetition of our waking-state
patterns may not yield any new clues. Thus having another dimension of
consciousness to study may help keep the search alive. For example, I had
occasional dreams where I would realize that I wasn't "Art Ticknor" in the
dreams. I was looking out of some stranger's eyes. Huh? How could that be, I'd
ask myself on waking.
Tempering the steel before a blow.
The most memorable dream of my life occurred when I was doing a solitary retreat
in a cabin in the woods. The dream began with me standing at a bus stop, waiting
for Jesus. He was in the bus that arrived, looking nothing like any
representation I'd ever seen of him, but there was no doubt in my mind about who
it was. We got off the bus at the next stop, went into a building, and sat on
the edge of a stage as in a school auditorium. There had been no conversation to
that point. The first word he said was my name, "Arthur," and I observed my
surprise at how he knew what it was. Then he finished the sentence with:
"everything is going to be okay." When I heard that, I started weeping. I awoke
still weeping. And every time I recalled the dream over the next few days, I
began weeping again -- having no idea why. Two months later, my father died of a
heart attack. His health up to that time was fine, as far as I knew. In
retrospect, I felt that the dream had been a way of preparing me for the blow --
using the only symbol that would trump the father figure in the mind of my
childhood.
Preview mode of becoming an observer detached from the observed.
Another standout dream for me was one in which the childhood friend mentioned
above and I were in a general store with an 1800s country-western feeling. We
were waiting to pay for purchases, watching the friendly interchange between the
store owner and a young woman with her infant girl. Then time stopped -- motion
stopped -- and my awareness was outside my dream-body, looking back at myself
and my friend, with the scene registering as a nostalgic still life complete
with a rectangle of sunlight on the wide-plank floor. Another example of the
sense of self being loosened from its attachment to objects.
When watching a video or reading a book, we often become temporarily identified
with a particular character. When the movie stops or the book is closed, we
eventually awaken from the spell. This is essentially what happens when the
spell of individuality is broken and we awaken to our true identity.
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Getting Back to What's Important
by Jeff Crilley
It is only recently that I began to work with my dreams. I have not interpreted
hundreds of my dreams -- only dozens. However, every dream which I have given
serious consideration to has shown me something important about myself that has
been particularly relevant to my life and my search. I have been amazed
at how valuable, accurate, and enlightening dreams can be.
It is hard to sum up what I have learned from studying my dreams because what I
take from them is personal. My dreams tell me about myself. They reveal things
to me which upon reflection I see are true even though I often had believed the
opposite. Several particularly valuable things which dreams have shown me come
to mind, but I feel it might be more worthwhile to discuss a recent significant
dream and what I took from it as opposed to just listing all of the different
things my dreams have shown me.
In the beginning of this dream it was dark, and I was lying in bed at night.
Several times I felt on the verge of coming apart/fading away/changing. A voice
at first told me to let go and let things take their course -- to die -- and let
myself go into the fear and unknown. I felt fairly strong fear, and as this
continued to go on a voice told me to befriend death and not be afraid. After
the third time of feeling on the verge of fading away and then coming out of it,
a voice which I recognized as Richard Rose's told me it (i.e., becoming)
was not going to happen that night. I felt somewhat disappointed, but things
became vague at that point and the the dream faded out. Then I "woke up" into a
new dream but with a recollection of the dream I had just had. I was outside,
and there was a picnic of some kind -- a gathering. It was sunny and everything
was light colored and fair. I found myself in the midst of a dance. I was
concerned I might be the only guy and thus look feminine, but looking around I
saw other guys dancing. The whole scene had a country feel. Then I found I was
dancing with all girls, but the dance had changed so that it now demonstrated
that all of the girls desired me, not that I was like a girl. It didn't feel
real however -- the dance was just telling a story. Myself and the girls were
just role-players was how it felt to me -- everything was out there and just
going along on its own. I became concerned with getting away so that I could
record and think about the dream I had just had. An opportunity arose, and I
slipped away and went into a building. Things had a much different feel inside.
It was dim and vague -- unclear and unknown.
At first glance, like most of my dreams, I did not have a sense of this dream or
its message. However while considering it and talking it over with a friend,
things began to fall into place. One of the first things I noticed was how the
background of the dream scenes went from dark to light to dark, reflecting the
changing mood of the dream. Darkness was associated with going within, whereas
when things were light it was relatively nice but superficial and became
unsatisfying. While considering a title for this dream what occurred to me and
struck a chord was "Getting back to what's important." The title helped put
things together and give clarity to what the main message of the dream was --
that is, what I feel the dream was about. Thinking about the dream in relation
to my life, the parallels and significance of it seem clear. For the two weeks
prior to the dream I had been running away from the fear, longing and sadness
that I felt inside. I sought distraction more than I had in a long time, but
soon it was not satisfying or effective anymore. The dream reflected this and
served as a reminder and catalyst to get back to what was important -- going
within. The beginning part of the dream also indicated that fear of the unknown
and fear of death were significant obstacles that were preventing me from going
within and becoming. Those fears were in part what I had been running from in my
waking life, and I feel that the dream was indicating that I need to face or
alleviate those fears in part by befriending death, as the voice in the dream
suggested. I took other things from this dream as well, but they require greater
context to explain, and what I did discuss I feel gets to the heart of what the
dream was saying.
As I said at the beginning I have been amazed at how helpful dreams can be. I
have found them to be powerful and intimate in speaking to my life, revealing
things which I am unaware of and often also providing guidance. Despite only
seriously working with them for a short period of time, I feel that dreams have
been invaluable to me.
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In Your Dreams: An Index to the Series
From the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, Monday, December 8, 2003
The average person will spend 50,000 hours of his life dreaming -- more than two
hours a night, every night. For an activity that consumes so much of our time,
however, scientists still don't completely understand why we dream or what
dreams mean.
In this
five-part series, "In Your Dreams," the Post-Gazette provides the latest
information and newest theories on dreaming. We talked to dozens of sleep
researchers and dream experts from around the nation, as well as everyday people
who are fascinated by the subject and keep track of their dreams in elaborate
journals. Our goal: To shed as much light as we could on the mysteries of the
night.
Day One: The Science of Dreams
Day Two: The History of Dreaming
Day Three: Nightmares
Day Four: Intruders in the Night
Day Five: Taking Control
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On Dream Study, by Jim Burns
There is a free association part of the mind that is like a citizen's band
scanner, constantly going up and down the channels. Your inner mind is
constantly trying to get your outer self aware of what's going on within
yourself until you've answered to that need. It keeps throwing balls over the
fence. As you drive down the road your mind will constantly pick out this fence
or that tree, or this sign. You're accustomed to it and assume that everyone
else's mind does the same thing. If you analyzed why you pick this or that to
see out of everything that is available, there is a definite reason and pattern
to it. It follows very closely the things that come in ordinary dreaming (which
is another method of throwing balls over the fence.) The dream-maker uses these
things in waking life. They are attempts to guide you to what in you is
unfulfilled.
When I was young I learned that dreams were the source of all necessary
information. It's good to go to sleep slowly and to wake up slowly. If you have
a nagging dream, just lie in bed and be quiet. Try and be conscious of no-thing,
which is different than nothing. Just let it come to you. All the pictography of
the dream is an attempt by the inner stage master to throw things over the fence
to key you in to what is happening in your insides. Through dreams you can
repair the bridge to the inner self and again become a whole person. Realizing
something in a dream isn't enough; you have to become aware of it in the waking
state. When I was good at dreams, several times I was able to go deep inside
myself and hear the dream and actually be able to see it, and get a person to
repeat what they said time after time until I was able to re-experience the
dream. In interpreting my dreams, what I would do when I woke up was to go all
the way back to the crossover state. The feelings that the dreams elicit are the
things that tell you what the dream means, so you have to be able to go right
back into it. Whatever the same feelings are that would occur to you when you
are awake, is what the dream is trying to get to. The real point in dreams is to
get it to come back so clearly that you get all the feelings as they went by.
*
When you are doing what your soul wants to do, you'll have so much energy you
won't know what to do with it. If it is in the mental realm, you have to balance
it by doing something physical to bring the body chemistry back into
equilibrium. You will start head tripping if you don't. You have to do something
physical to bring yourself back down. Locations have something to do with this
also. There's such a thing as not being able to be your true self in certain
locations or places associated with negative experiences. In dreams you go to
the locations or settings where you can be your true self.
Your inner side is always trying to bring these things to your attention.
Paranoia is another method, and is not delusion but your inner mind trying to
get you to pay attention to something, and it won't stop until you bite the
bullet. Hearing voices is another example. Voices are a person's own self, and
if you could demonstrate that, it would be the end of voices. I know. I've been
down that road.
From At Home with the Inner Self by James J. Burns. A digital version of
this out-of-print book is available at the
Mystic Missal site.
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A First Step
by Bob Fergeson
"It might seem funny to write in our waking-life appointment book "reserve time
for self-exploration," but, in order to be healthy and whole, that is exactly
what we have to do. (Even if it looks like the height of laziness or
irresponsibility from the point of view of the waking ego, which is driven to
make the most of every precious moment.) This dream (forgetting the baby)
informs you that ignoring one's deepest spiritual needs and desires is the truly
irresponsible activity -- as irresponsible as agreeing to look after a baby, and
then forgetting about it." - Jeremy Taylor
Dream study was an important step in my journey to self-discovery, for
several reasons. It gave me a way to begin the process of seeing my own mind by
retreating from it, by seeing the moods that governed its behavior, and by
starting that all-important inward movement, the backing away from illusion.
Most importantly, it gave me a discipline, an open window, through which I could
begin my journey. It shook my belief in my "self," and convinced me of my own
ignorance. Dream study was my window to awakening. There are others, as varied
the individuals who find them. What is important is to find yours, and take the
first step on the path.
While the study of our dreams may seem like a superfluous or shallow way of
finding ourselves as one with the Absolute, if we shut out any form of
self-study before we get started by saying that we understand that there is
no doer, that there is nothing but the one, we have perhaps fallen for the
trick of the ego and its survival program. Its job is to stop all inner
movement before it gets started, to keep us from ever making a move. An
intellectual understanding of the abstract concepts of no doer, the one, the
absolute and effortlessness, is not what we're after. This is simply the ego
using the intellect to distract us, leading us deeper into the realm of
imagination and fantasy. Eventually, this fantasy will be tested by the
traumas of life, and we will come to know if we have actually reached more
than an intellectual understanding of ourselves. Copping out through the
intellect and unconscious belief in abstract concepts will not help us. By
starting work on any proven discipline, such as dream work, we've made that
first move against our ego, into the Unknown and out of our safe conceptual
nest.
Like a lot of others, I too grabbed eagerly at the intellectual concepts of
the non-doer and the One. I also came to admit that this did not dispel the
inner angst, did not make it evaporate. The misery was still there, if I
was honest with myself and watched my day-to-day life. The intellect could
not get rid of the problem; the inner angst still resided in the feeling
self. But I came to see, once I finally made a move and started a
discipline through dream work, that by finding out what moods were driving
me, what my states of mind were, and by making that simple turn within
which started a vector of self-observation, I found relief. It became
fascinating, and I noticed that I was discovering an unknown territory
called myself, while before I had only been playing games in the intellect.
Things started getting better.
The ego can use the intellect to juggle abstract concepts and make the inner
imaginative world primary and of more value than the world of perception.
This is simply a trick to keep us out of real work. By disciplines such as
studying our dreams, one can begin to see how this trap works, in ourselves.
We can see how we're tricked into thinking that simply because we can
project and believe in abstract concepts in our imagination, that this is
somehow going to relieve our misery and change the world.
The ego mind can play pretty elaborate tricks. One of these is to shut down
the self-discovery process at the outset, to say that the study of dreams is
only the mind playing around in the mind, that it takes effort, isn't going
to lead us to the One, and is only furthering delusion. But this line of
thinking is also just the mind talking to itself; the ego again using the
mind to fool the mind. Instead of seeking an answer, it cops out of the
search in a grand and prideful manner. This does not make sense and is
simply another way the ego tricks us into inaction, thus maintaining the
status quo of ignorance and illusion.
The study of our dreams can be the first step into our mind. We start
looking at ourselves. We're told that the one thing we don't know anything
about is the self, and yet that's what we must study. By studying dreams we
can do this from a safe place by studying the mind obliquely. We begin to
see what our mind patterns are without the interference of the ego survival
program shutting us down before we get started. This is important, because
by beginning to study our dreams we start to take a turn within. We start to
look at ourselves rather than looking only at our imagination and its
projections.
Secondly, what is important is that we begin to discover our moods, and
eventually, to see what our dominant state of mind is. By looking at the
pattern of our dreams over a period of time, we can see what our dominant
moods are, and how they affect our day-to-day life. Again, we see this
obliquely at first through the dreams, and later come to see how it's
happening in our waking life as well. This leads us eventually to seeing
what our state of mind is. We can't see our state of mind when we're in it,
or even know that we have one; we're too close to it. But through our dreams
we can get a handle on it and begin to see the underlying forces that guide
our thoughts, feelings, and life.
And thirdly, through the study of dreams and the correlation between them
and our waking life, we'll eventually come to see that it is all in the
mind, and that the mind has limits. We'll come face-to-face with our own
mechanicalness, the limits of our mental powers, and that the mind cannot
free itself from itself. By the study of our dreams, self-study, we've
created a vector pointed within, which will carry us past the limits of the
mechanical mind into the Unknown. Here, we leave all dreams behind, even the
dream of our life, and make the leap from the known world of the mind and
dreams back into the Unknown realm of the Real, to who and what we really
are.
The above said, dream study is only good for certain people. Some find
nothing in it, and for them other avenues of search must be found. If your
mind thinks along the lines of metaphor, then dream study could be useful to
you. If you're fascinated with it, and can stick with it long enough to get
something from it, go for it.
A couple of links to help with starting a study of one's dreams:
University of Yourself and
Jeremy Taylor. See Bob's web sites,
The Mystic Missal, the
Photo Site, and
The Listening Attention. Illuminated letter D by
Heidi Mann.
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Humor...
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When a guru's not engaged in meditation
A-reciting of his mantra for the week,
His capacity for infantile inflation
Is enough to drive disciples up the creek.
He will take the girls aside for tantric yoga
While celibacy's ordered for the chaps;
If he starts behaving like an angry ogre
He will claim it's just to make your pride
collapse.
Oh, with all this yogic practice to be done,
A disciple's lot is not a happy one.
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This poem by John Wren-Lewis was inspired by "The Policemens' Chorus" from
The Pirates of Penzance and the first (1988) edition of The Serpent
Rising by Mary Garden. For more on and by Wren-Lewis, see Alan Mann's
Capacitie site and the TAT Forum index.
Reader Commentary:
(We appreciate hearing from you.)
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Most of the items in this month's Forum are selections in response to last
month's call for papers: "What have you learned from studying your dreams?" We
want to thank everyone who took the time to reply, regardless of whether your
essay was chosen for inclusion. This month's contents:
